Wednesday, January 18, 2006

what happens when you leave glory unattended

yeah, i'm being lazy. yeah, i posted this on a message board yesterday. yeah i don't have anything to say. yeah, i'm late. well, my fault. but, i did write this myself, so it counts.

how come people ask for volunteers but don't have nothing for them to do
how come people give the screwface when you express a desire to have something to do when they know that's what you're there for
how come one experience can sour you on dealing with folks henceforth
how come i said henceforth
how come that was hot
how come people don't return messages
how come who has time for games
how come everybody and they mama wants to help me before i'm ready to move
how come i hope they're still around when i am
how come they can keep their dayum politics
how come that is not what i'm here for
how come this will absotively posilutely be the busiest weekend ever
how come i'm nervous and i hope it all goes off okay
how come i wonder will the poets forget me when i'm gone
how come i wonder if i can ever really be gone even if i need to be
how come moving to philly would make some sense
how come i've crossed the bridge every day lately, as if i work there
how come i even know the neighborhood i'd like to live in
how come i'll probly stay here though - family loyalty, ya know
how come the closer to the bridge the better though
how come i think i want a fishbowl
how come i'm not sure...
how come baby showers cost so much money
how come i come to work only because it makes the rest of my life possible
how come that is so important to understand right now
how come they're on my clock just as much as i'm on theirs
how come the opportunities are at my fingertips
how come i can't wait to see how this all plays out
how come i gotta remember to email my cousin
how come messing around with y'all i'll never get my laundry done
how come i'm bout to just buy new drawls
how come i really miss in-house laundry equipment
how come i hate the 'mat so much
how come i wonder sometimes if i've bit off more than i can chew
how come my ambition is tempered
how come there's a method to my madness
how come sometimes if you think you want something really bad, if you just wait, you'll see that as time passed, your passion waned, and it helps you keep things in perspective
how come sometimes waiting kills passion that should stay sizzling
how come wisdom is knowing when to pounce and when to ruminate
how come it's funny i just realized that was in the fantastic four
how come who knew there was a lesson in the comic book movie
how come i have music lessons to take
how come i don't know which instrument to prioritize or where to get my lessons
how come same for dance
how come i've lived this long and am just getting to learning what i really want and doing what i really want
how come i feel old but life is just beginning
how come i hope i'm blessed with a long one because there are so many more things to do
how come i have so many dreams and time seems so short
how come i need money to make it all happen
how come that last how come makes me ache for all its implications
how come you are still reading this long ramble
how come i am being extremely piscean lately
how come two fish one swimming upstream one swimming down
how come i am such a stereotype
how come the longer i live the more i see that there are countless women
how come believing i am unique as a person, as an artist, as a woman, as an aspirant takes faith
how come it always comes around to faith eventually when i get going
how come that is the only thing that makes the difference for me sometimes
how come what would i do without it
how come really, what would i do without it
how come other people seem to be able to live without it
how come i can't imagine living with no faith
how come i'd die by my own hand, i'm sure
how come it's cause i don't belong here
how come that's why i was born five years and five days late
how come that's why i'm so creative
how come i'm just trying to get back to the energy i came from
how come i'm getting too deep
how come who cares, holla if you hear me
how come i might finally be apathetic enough to stop stressing soon
how come i might finally be passionate enough to stop waiting
how come that made perfect taoist sense to me
how come if i had a tattoo that would be it
how come that symbol of balance is so much better than a blond white woman holding scales
how come she is a fallible human, subject to gravity, screw the blindfold
how come the presence and absence of light are Creator made, infallible, and worthy of symbolizing the poignant dance of each soul
how come i sure do have a lot of reading to do