Saturday, July 01, 2006

elevate

this is the year of self-definition and change for me so far.

everything is being overhauled. new goals, new friendship, new address, new ride, new job, and new understanding of what is and is not important to me. i've been coming full circle, facing old dreams and old understanding of who i was and have always been and i'm trying to reconcile my new growth to my old knowledge of self. it's and exciting and amazing time for me. it's good to know that you don't simply get to a certain age and life stops evolving and developing. i hope i always have at least enough wisdom to know that there is more wisdom out there for me to get.

in the meantime, i am running. ain't nobody heard from me except precious few people. i've been calling home less and less. my best girlfriends and i have missed appointments to see each other. my extended family is probably all but mad at me for my silence and distance and unreturned calls. twelve hours out of every day are taken up by getting to and from work. i've been trying to build artistically with people, and i've been sketching out plans, and i haven't been able to get up with the other poets to build and learn from them and give them what i have to offer. i've been missing poetry venues. i haven't been on the boards. i haven't been on myspace, or reading the blogs i like, and it hurts my heart that i haven't had time to blog.

i ain't down on myself though. this is a transitional period. i'm blessed, my bills are paid and i am making some progress, here and there, wherever i can. i got a few poems written over the last few days. i've been out to jus words. i'll be back in the venues. i'll schedule writing sessions so i can get it in. i'll reach out to the writers i want to build with and make (and keep!) appointments. i'll visit my aunties and reconnect with my girls. i am a person who handled full time classes and three jobs when i was in school - i'm not invincible, but i'm clever, and divinely inspired and energized. be patient with me. there is so much good stuff in store from me. features coming up. projects in the works. this is what i get for being around eagles. i can't help but elevate my own flight.